I'm sitting at my computer with my headphones in, staring at the screen and wishing I could pull my thoughts together long enough to have them make sense on the page... They're just so scrambled... it's almost in a circle too. One person relates me to the thought of the one who follows...sometimes, just for a minute or an hour I wish I didn't have to think about anyone. But, they affect me. Your sadness, pain, confusion, guilt, happiness... all of it makes me think of you. All of you. You might not think you are significant, but you are.
How many times in a day do we feel an emotion that we regard as unimportant? That no one would be interested, or we don't want to share it cause its so very personal and no one else could possibly understand? So what if, we were wrong? What if just for a minute we shared anyways... and just for that minute, we feel less lonely? Whether its someone to share in our happiness, soothe our pain, or ease our guilt? Is loneliness a choice? Are we choosing to be alone in our emotional state? And I realize that there are people out there who don't really give a shit about anyone, but, its not like we're any worse off than we were before, right?
Is the choice to be alone the safer one? The idea of sharing our deepest emotions with another person who could possibly not care just so intimidating, that we would rather be alone with whats in our hearts and head? I mean who REALLY wants to share their inner most thoughts just to have them ignored? No one. No one could possibly ever want that.
In my opinion, I'd rather share with someone who I think I can trust, and have it ignored, and find out who they really are. So those of you who share with me, whether its in passing or in a deep conversation, your emotions are not dismissed. They are not ignored. And they matter. I think about you when you aren't around, I wonder how you are and if everything is still as wonderful or miserable as last time we spoke. I care about your heart and mind... and I know that sometimes it helps to have someone, but its not necessarily the right someone, and you feel alone anyways, but I promise, it still matters. YOU still matter.
I never told you that I loved you. Probably because I never should have been in that situation but still...
ReplyDeleteWhoever wrote that comment above.... please please email me or private message me or text me with who you are.
ReplyDeleteThere are attitudes that people feel and reasons that people feel it. I am sure this will all be settled soon. Be aware though that intentions that are sought after and pretended to fixed often get "stirred" and assumed as fake.
ReplyDeleteBe careful, there is more to be seen in the light.